Welcome to another Self Love Challenge – 21 Days of creating and developing more of a meaningful relationship with yourself – fundamentally, the key relationship which creates the foundation to all other relationships!

DAY 1 – 20th August 

So, let’s start at the beginning – before you can develop your Self Love, I want you think about, WHAT IS SELF LOVE? What does it mean? What does loving yourself look and feel like?

Before we can apply something to our life, we must understand what it is and why it is important. 

So for today that’s all I want you to do, simply reflect on the concept of SELF LOVE – ask a friend or colleague; ‘ How would you define Self Love?’ Share your definitions with me! Comment below 😃

To get more involved follow me on Instagram @enlightcounselling and Facebook. 

 So, how did you get on with the first day of the challenge? Click here to see how others defined Self Love and let us know how you got on too!

Day 2 – 21st August








Now that you have had time to reflect on what Self Love is and before we really get into the challenge, have a think about how much you LOVE YOURSELF.  Don’t rush the answer, just ponder it throughout the day.  Your initial response might be different to the response that transpires later in the day and it might be worth making note of both of those. 

Think about not just loving and accepting the ‘good’ parts of you, but also the shadow parts, so this will be things like flaws, unhealthy habits, that critical inner voice perhaps, the regretful part and so on…

Do you like these parts of yourself?  Is it possible to love these parts?  Do you want to love them? Or do you you need to accept them? Perhaps you want to be free from them ?

With all this is mind HOW MUCH DO YOU LOVE YOURSELF…. RIGHT NOW…Scale  0 to 10 – 10 being the most. 

Once you have done that, think about, how much you want to love yourself by the end of this challenge? Remember even if you move from a 6 to a 7, that is progress! 

So that’s the challenge for today! How much do you love yourself, and how much do you want to love yourself by the end of the challenge… and then we will work on how you can develop that Self Love for yourself!

Have a good day πŸ™‚ 

Day 3 – 22nd August

Hey guys now you have established how much you feel you love yourself, you might be surprised if you rated yourself higher or lower than expected, or you might be more assured that the score you initially gave yourself remained the same once you pondered on it during the day.  You would have reflected on your ‘flaw’s and the dark and ugly bits too – we will come back to these later in the challenge.

For now……








Firstly I want you to think about one aspect of yourself  that you want to embrace more of.

For instance this may be the fun, creative, adventurous or spontaneous side of you.

It might be the loving part of you, or the bit that shys away from praise, or owning your own skills and talents.

Think of the part of you that comes out only occasionally, but actually you’d love it to come out more often, knowing how wonderful you would feel if you embraced this part more. 

What is it, that you’d like to embrace more?  

Comment below πŸ™‚ 

Day 4 – 23rd August

 Today take 5 to 10 minutes out of your day, to sit quietly in your own company. Take some deep breaths, close your eyes and repeat this affirmation 3 times:
If you get distracted by other thoughts, don’t worry – It is natural especially if you are not use to focusing on yourself like this. Just stop and start again, until you are able to repeat the affirmation 3 times, with the least distraction possible. 
To take this challenge further, repeat this affirmation in your mind whenever you get the chance throughout the day, like waiting in a queue for something, when your travelling, when you suddenly find a spare moment etc….
Also if you want notice how repeating this affirmation makes you feel and write it down.  Keeping a written journal throughout this Challenge is helpful to reflect upon your progress. 
Someone who took part in my 21 Day Challenge in January got in touch today to say she rated her Self Love as a 5 at that time, aiming for a 6, but felt she achieved a 6.5 and this time round 8 months later she rated herself as a 7 at the beginning of this challenge and is aiming for a 8.5. 

When we begin to focus on Self Love and make it part of everyday life, it begins to grow and get more resilient over time! 

So that’s it for today’s challenge – Go love and Embrace yourselves!

DAY 5 – 24th August

How did you find yesterday’s affirmations? Were you able to do them easily or did it take some work? It can feel quite a task saying you love and embrace yourself… it is not something we are taught right? The more you practice it daily though, the more comfortable it will feel. 

TODAY – BE KIND TO YOURSELF –This will help you to make friends with the parts of you, you may have struggled to love and embrace during Day 4. 
Today hold in mind KINDNESS; Self Kindness. Show yourself kindness throughout the day.  Some ways to show yourself kindness:
  • Eat a healthy meal… drink more water
  • Call a friend who lifts your spirit
  • If you’re tired, have an early night 
  • If you really don’t feel like doing something, SAY NO
  • If things feel too much STOP and give yourself a few minutes break 
  • Get some fresh air 
  • Sooth yourself with a bath, candles, relaxing music
  • Focus on all the good things that happen today
  • Take a lunch break, away from your desk
  • Repeat an affirmation that you resonate with,  ‘I deserve kindness’, OR  ‘Today I am being kind to myself’, OR ‘I am surrounded with kindness from within and without’. 
You can show yourself KINDNESS in the SMALLEST DAILY ACTS 
So with that in mind, how do you think you are going to be kind to yourself today? COMMENT BELOW πŸ™‚ 

DAY 6 – 25th August 

Hopefully you found a way and created time to be kind to yourself during Day 5 What did you do?  See what others did here

Today’s exercise is a reflective one.

Just get on with your day and throughout it notice what things give you joy. When do you light up? At which point(s) do you feel the happiest?








At the end of the day look back  at your day abd try to find at least 3 things or times (there might be more!) when you felt the most JOY and HAPPINESS. 

Self Love is allowing yourself to feel happy. Today don’t let these moments pass you by – stop and notice. 

Have a great day πŸ™‚ 


DAY 7 – 26th August 

So,  how did Day 6 go? Did you find joy? In what things, people or moments did you experience joy?








You have reflected on a alot this week, and although we are focusing on LOVE, we can not develop this without ALSO facing our shadows, demons, lower self – whatever you want to call it. Feelings such as low self esteem, self worth, anger, jealousy, insecurity, fear, self doubt etc. 

Slowly you can aim to embrace all these parts (As Day 4), by starting to face them head on rather than avoiding them (which is what we naturally do, in order to protect ourselves from experiencing uncomfortable feelings). 

So for TODAY, give yourself acknowledgement for sticking to this challenge so far! WELL DONE! Continue to NOTICE JOY today but this time also notice when a SHADOW TYPE OF FEELING emerges. Then in your mind (or out loud) say: 

‘I am patiently beginning to love you more each day’ 

Keep repeating this until the feeling shifts, or reduces… even if slightly. Then continue with your day with the concept of Joy at the forefront of your mind again. 

Have a great day and keep spreading the love πŸ™‚ 

8 thoughts on “21 Day Self Love Challenge – Starts 20th August”

  • Kiran kumari says :

    Self love is loving and treating yourself with kindness ..rewarding and taking time out for urself xx

    1. Sukhi says :

      Yes Kiran, that is so important:)

  • Sita Devi says :

    Thank you the challenge !!
    Self love is honouring yourself in every way possible.
    Accepting who you are: the good part, the bad the crazy, the happy, sad all of you. The mind, emotional, physical part and your soul . The past experiences have brought you to where you are today.. your choices, experiences everything.
    Loving yourself is accepting yourself wholeheartedly and loving it.
    Well that’s what I think lol

    1. Sukhi says :

      ‘Loving yourself whole heartedly’ – I love that!

  • Kiran kumari says :

    I love my Self and accept all flaws about me ..I love my Self but not enough each day I look to learn and create new things which makes me realise I’m in love with myself like make up or different types of clothes I’m me and I love me and my company at the end of this I want to teach my daughter to fall in love with herself and gain power and confidence x

    1. Sukhi says :

      By modelling Self Love to your daughter, you inevitably will have a ripple effect on her and others around you πŸ™‚

  • Rannatta says :

    I love myself in which I’ve not done in a long time and I’m now listening to myself x

    1. Sukhi says :

      Thats is wonderful to hear!

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